


bittersweet melody

by yukitsubute



Category: Arashi (Band), Johnny's Entertainment
Genre: Light Angst, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-15
Updated: 2015-08-15
Packaged: 2018-04-14 21:19:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4580526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yukitsubute/pseuds/yukitsubute
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nino's life is dark and foggy, but there are people who can make life worth living.</p>
            </blockquote>





	bittersweet melody

„Life isn’t always nice and smooth.“ Nino whispered. He looked out of the window. Little snowflakes were dancing up and down in front of him. He counted them, just to distract himself from thinking. Every inch of his body hurt – not from an injury, but because he didn’t feel any life spirit in his body anymore. He was tired, too tired to sleep. He couldn’t close his eyes – he couldn’t stand the darkness right now. Pictures popped up when he closed his eyes. He tried to think about anything and everything that came to his mind, but not about the last months. He didn’t want to let one single thought about it occupy his mind.  
  
“Ahm, Nino, we gonna start rehearsing now.” a voice said. Nino winced because of the sudden interruption in the silence around him. He really couldn’t think about dancing, singing and smiling right now, but in the end, it was his job.  
  
“I’m coming, Oh-chan.” he said, his voice soft, totally different from before. He could see Ohno’s sad glance. It made him angry. He didn’t want to be pitied. He sighed. Of course his friends cared about him, but nevertheless, it annoyed him.  
  
He took one last glance out of the window before he left the room, his place of silence, the place where he was alone. He followed the other down the corridor till they reached their rehearsal room.  
  
“If you need someone to talk to,” Ohno started, but the other immediately cut him off. “Sorry, Ohno, but I really don’t want to talk to anyone right now.”  
  
Nino saw the other just nodding at him. He knew his words were a bit too harsh, but right now, he just couldn’t react in any other way.  
  
Nino did everything they wanted him to do during the rehearsal, but he was faraway with his thoughts. “Nino, left, not right.” he heard Jun say. It made Nino smile a little, and just for a short moment. Normally, Jun would yell at him because he again didn’t know his steps. It’s been week now since they’ve started talking to him like he’d break down if they berated him with harsh words. Maybe he would, maybe he just hasn’t realized it yet.  
  
“We will go out together tonight.” Aiba said after the rehearsals. Nino could see the others looking at Aiba like they wanted to tell him that it is hopeless to ask him.  
  
“No, thank you. I’m going straight home.” Nino just said. He walked to the door wanting to leave, but he heard a loud noise behind him. He turned to see what it was.  
  
Ohno stood there, his hands in fists. He had thrown his bag against the wall. It was the noise Nino heard. “Enough.” he said, his eyes small like he’s going to jump Nino.  
  
“What?” Nino asked. He could see the others looking at Ohno in disbelief. Sho tried to touch Ohno’s shoulder to calm him down, but he only shook Sho’s hand off.  
  
“You know, we all understand your feelings, but honestly, you really exhaust us. We’re trying to be patient, we’re doing everything not to upset you. We even handle you with kid gloves, but really, it’s over now.” Ohno’s voice resounded in the room. He let out a loud sigh, as if he had been carrying those words in him for months.  
  
Nino blinked at him. For one moment, everyone in the room kept quiet. Nino stared at his friend. He had never ever seen Ohno lose control like he did right now. Ohno isn’t the type to yell at someone. He was “Mr. Patient”. That’s how Aiba called him. Nino tilted his head a little. He wanted to answer, but Ohno looked at the others and grumbled, “I’ll be on my boat.” With that, he ran out of the door before Nino could say anything. The door closed with a loud noise.  
  
The others looked at the ground, purposely not facing Nino. It seemed no one wanted to comment on what had just happened. “What was that?” Nino finally said.  
  
“You know, Oh-chan is right. We’ve been really sensitive about your situation, especially Ohno. He tried to be there for you, but you always push him away. Now, even for him, it’s already too much.” Sho said. Nino sighed. He leaned against the table behind him and looked from one to the other. Even Jun, who wasn’t stumped, didn’t say anything.  
  
He rubbed his palms over his face. Was he really that mean to all of them? Of course he was in a bad mood, but did he ask too much from his friends? He thought about the past weeks of his life.  
  
It all happened one horrible evening. His long-time friend died because of sickness. Of course, he had expected it. He knows it would inevitably happen one day. His friend meant everything to Nino.  They lived together and they shared their lives. They were helplessly in love with each other. But on that fateful evening, Nino’s world got dark. He can no longer see sunshine in his life. He didn’t really remember the first evening after his friend’s death. He tried to think about it.  
  
He was at home. He cried. He called a number. He opened the door. Why did he forget that he had called Ohno? They sat next to each other, almost the whole night. Ohno was holding his hand without saying a word. He was there, just listening, even though Nino didn’t say a word. But in case he would talk, Ohno was there.  
  
During the funeral, it was again Ohno who stood behind him, his hand on Nino’s shoulder like he wanted to say that he is there, no matter what. But Nino didn’t recognize it. He was caught in his sadness; he didn’t see that there are people supporting him.  
Ohno would drop by from time to time after that. He would just sit next to Nino and watch him play games. Nino played without really concentrating on it. He just did it to pass time. Ohno never complained. He was like a ghost, but he was there watching over him.  
  
“Why can’t I remember?”  
  
“Sometimes our brains play a trick on us. They make us forget hard times.” It was Aiba who answered him. Nino looked at his friends sadly. It wasn’t only Ohno who was there for him. Aiba brought him muffins to cheer him up. Jun tried to take him out for dinner. And Sho wanted to go out with him in the evening. He ignored them. Nino nibbled on his lower lip. Now he felt really guilty. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am.” he whispered.  
  
“It’s okay, I guess. But maybe you should talk to Ohno. I think you don’t know what it meant to him to see you like this.” It was Jun who was talking now.  
  
Nino looked at his friends. “I am really sorry for bothering all of you so much. I will try to change, I promise.”  
  
The others nodded at him. “Go now.” Aiba pushed him softly out of the door.  
  
Nino rushed down the street.  
  
“You really have a special relationship.” Ohno once said.  
  
“We are something like soul mates.” Nino said back then.  
  
“More like lovers.” Ohno laughed. Nino could hear the special tone in Ohno’s voice. Already, back then, he had a strange feeling about it.  
  
“When I am gone, I know you are in good hands.” Nino heard his friend’s voice in his head. It was shortly before he died. Ohno was there to visit them.  
  
Nino stopped for a moment. “You already knew that Oh-chan would care about me?” He looked up to the sky, like he’d get an answer from there. Nino had to smile. It was a sad smile, but with Ohno’s outburst, something in him broke. A barrier opened and he saw that he was on his way to destroying what he had once treasured so much – and maybe he treasures it much more than he was aware of.  
  
Nino reached the harbor breathless. His lungs were hurting from running. He could see Ohno’s boat, rocking slowly with the waves. Nino already got seasick when he thought about going on that boat. He let a breath out and walked up to the small landing stage. He hated boats, but he didn’t want to call out for the other.  
  
He could see Ohno sitting on the stern, staring at the horizon. He seemed to be calm, like how Nino knew the other to be. But he didn’t want to know how Ohno felt inside. He could just imagine, and it hurt him.  
  
“I am sorry.” he said. He could see Ohno wincing a little, but he didn’t turn to face him.  
  
Nino tried to walk up to the other without concentrating on the boat’s movements. Finally, he reached him and sat next to him. “I am sorry.” he said again.  
  
Ohno turned to him, a little smile curling around his lips. It wasn’t a happy smile, but positive. “It’s okay.” Ohno said.  
  
Nino sat next to his friend. They looked at the sea together. None of them was saying anything. After a while, Nino leaned his head on Ohno’s shoulder and the other let him.  
  
His ghost was back, just that he wasn’t a ghost anymore. From now on, Nino would concentrate on noticing the other every second he was next to him.


End file.
